Happy Mini Christmas! No, wait, got that wrong. It’s normal-sized Christmas, but the cakes are tiny! Or perhaps we’re all giants. We may never know.
Today’s Recicember recipe is from GoodToKnow, which is one of those websites “for women” that has recipes, family life tips, and the ability to get outraged by P!nk drinking a cup of coffee.
Also, thanks, P!nk, half of your name is underlined in red because the spell checker thinks “nk” is not a word. It’s fine with “P!” though…
Let’s get cracking!
This recipe has 4 steps. We’ve been here before. Let’s see what’s happening.
Step 1 – Bang on the oven, grease up your receptacle. OK, sounds good.
Step 2 – Chuck everything in a bowl and wallop it around with an electric mixer.
OK, that was easy.
Step 3 – Pour it in the receptacle(s). Put it in the oven.
Right, I’m not being funny, but that was actually 3 reasonable steps. Maybe 5 if we’re being pedantic. Perhaps step 1 should have been called “Prep” instead. But it’s certainly not one of those 18-steps-pretending-to-be-2-steps recipes.
Step 4 – Make icing, throw it on the cakes.
Bang. Done.
This is ridiculous. I am outraged. How dare GoodToKnow produce a recipe like this? Simple, straightforward, not involving a microwave. It’s people like this who end up on Jeremy Kyle, because their mother’s sister’s dogsitter is actually a transvestite banana salesman who owns a shed where a man lives that once married his own aunt. And that doesn’t say Christmas to anyone.
My only complaint about this recipe is that the cake itself is a “light” fruit cake. For a real Christmas cake, I want something you’ll struggle to lift off the plate. But there again, these are mini Christmas cakes, so I suppose light is fine.
I’m outraged. Merry mini Christmas.
TL;DR: P!nk breaks the spell checker. Straightforward recipe. Outraged.